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I don’t fit into a box and most of my life people have been trying to figure me out, including myself. During the course of this year I’ve been starting to appreciate that there’s no box big enough to hold the anomaly that is me. A friend sent me an Ani DiFranco song called In or Out which I just managed to listen to. I related. Completely. Thank you Ne. Have a listen y’all…

Guess there’s something wrong with me
Guess I don’t fit in
No one wants to touch it
No one knows where to begin
I’ve got more than one membership
To more than one club
And I owe my life
To the people that I love

He looks me up and down
Like he knows what time it is
Like he’s got my number
Like he thinks it’s his
He says,
Call me, Miss DiFranco,
If there’s anything I can do
I say,
It’s Mr. DiFranco to you

Somedays the line I walk
Turns out to be straight
Other days the line tends to deviate
I’ve got no criteria for sex or race
I just want to hear your voice
I just want to see your face

She looks me up and down
Like she thinks that I’ll mature
Like she’s got my number
Like it belongs to her
She says,
Call me, Ms. DiFranco
If there’s anything I can do
I say, I’ve got spots
I’ve got stripes, too

Their eyes are all asking
Are you in, or are you out
And I think, oh man,
What is this about?
Tonight you can’t put me
Up on any shelf

‘Cause I came here alone
I’m gonna leave by myself

I just want to show you
The way that I feel
And when I get tired
You can take the wheel to me
What’s more important
Is the person that I bring
Not just getting to the same restaurant
And eating the same thing

Guess there’s something wrong with me
Guess I don’t fit in
No one wants to touch it
No one knows where to begin
I’ve more than one membership
To more than one club
And I owe my life
To the people that I love

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I woke up in a foul mood today. Instinctively I knew something was wrong. And then I checked the date. I am exactly a month away fro turning 30. A pounding headache & a nightmarish day ensued. And then I checked my mail. A friend of mine sent me a link to a video, posted on this blog. It made me sit still, listen and read and despite the tears at that came at the end of it, I found my reason to believe. I maybe growing older, but my reasons for being are still intact. The personal ones not so much, the purposes more so. Made me want to rush into a phone booth and get into that red cape all over again. It’s beautiful & painful & all too true. Have a watch will ya?

Do pardon the corny song. The lyrics are meant to motivate, so it serves its purpose 🙂

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Lizzy the Lezzy

Simply Fab!

 

 

For more, visit www.lizzythelezzy.com

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For those of you who follow my blog, you’ll know that I am actively involved with the LGBTIQ community in Sri Lanka. But this post has nothing to do with that. It has more to do with my subconscious observations of human choices and needs that started (the observations, I mean) way before I became an advocate/activist and continues to date. It’s not quite an analysis of why people do what they do but merely a stating of facts. It’s about what people do with their sexuality/sexual orientation. There maybe no right or wrong, just as being of any sexual orientation isn’t wrong. They are merely moments that have been stuck in my head like a diary that I think I need to put down…

Sexuality | by Laura Ashdown

Sexuality | by Laura Ashdown

Some people live the perfect external existence of heterosexuals. They marry, have children and live out all that is expected of them whilst they turn to multiple same sex lovers in darkened spaces and places in their lives.

Some very ‘straight’ individuals opt to ‘turn’ gay or bisexual for various reasons. They deem it palatable when they weigh it against the benefits. Some for money, some because it’s a convenient escape from bad memories with people of the opposite sex, some simply because they think people of the same sex relate to them better.

Some are proud to be different. It’s not that they chose to swim against the wave, but find themselves against a current and still opt fight it, with pride and conviction. They stand up to a world with a multitude of different voices and say “I’m gay”, “I’m lesbian” etc. And they are willing to fight the good fight until they are accepted for who they are… pretty much more normal than most of the apparent straight laced fellows on the planet.

Some see no difference at all. Sexuality shouldn’t be a differentiating factor just like other givens like race, nationality, hair colour etc. For them there is only one cry, one statement that holds true to the entire human race; the fact that we are ‘one’.

Some stay with their straight lovers for as long as they can, finding their experiences enjoyable but void of moments that take their breath away and a certain oomph that they know that they’ll only find when they’re ready to break free and venture into new territory.

Some go through a great deal of their lives thinking they’re straight only to wake up one day and realize that there is more to life than the mundane they’ve been experiencing and walk readily into a life that holds so much more.

Some have no choice. They love in secret because they have it ingrained in their souls that it they cannot hurt the ones they love. Because, in the process of discovering their sexualities, they are also reminded of the others in their lives, like family and friends whose hearts would be broken if they were to love as they need to, out in the open, just like everyone else. They are stuck between their lovers and everyone else they love.

Some who are born to the privilege of ‘normalcy’ don’t understand the hue and cry from those that are different to them. They don’t understand the very essence of the fact that there could be anything different to the way they think and feel in the first place.

Some have the conviction that every non heterosexual person should ‘come out of the closet’. There is no point hiding who you are. Irrespective of the big, bad world out there, within a community of people who are similar to you, there should be no need to hide who you are and opt for so called ‘better’ company instead.

Some go through life knowing that they aren’t heterosexual right from puberty. They experiment with the same sex but grow up opting not to talk about it. They believe that sex, in any form is personal and should be kept behind closed doors where it belongs. They have no need to ‘come out of the closet’ so-to-speak and don’t understand why some others try to force them to. They believe that the openness of ones sexuality should be a matter of choice. They way they are, suits them just fine after all.

Some opt to go through life pretending and denying themselves of the possibility of more than they have. They go through the motions of life, not knowing how much more is waiting out there for them.

Some rare few are born into families who have no issue with their sexualities or any other choices their children make. They have the opportunity to live their lives free of the prejudice that is an inevitability for most others.

Some dress different, which has no relation their sexuality but get tagged as a certain ‘type’ or sexuality. They don’t know how to let the world know that the outward expression has nothing to with their sexuality or gender*. (see below)

Some have the strong need to identify themselves and be known as one sexuality or the other. They believe that identification markers are an important part of one’s individuality and expression. They are proud to be gay, just as they are proud to be Sri Lankan.

Some people have fluctuating sexualities. They go through life being different sexualities at different points in their lives. They make statements like ‘I’m straight again’, much to the chagrin of their contemporaries although they don’t seem to find any choice in the matter.

Some don’t feel any need to tag themselves based on their sexual behaviour or the people they chose to love. They are in essence, people who don’t believe in the need for tags. They seem to be able love irrespective of a person’s gender* or sexuality.

Some have no clue what to tag themselves as, even if they wanted to. They know they are attracted to both sexes, have been involved with both as well, but can’t seem to pay any heed to a person’s sex or genitalia when it comes to matters of the heart. They wear their hearts on their sleeves, but find ‘bi-sexual’ too limiting a word to use when it comes to love.

Some are merely disgruntled with their relationships and turn towards a new direction hoping to find some peace and love and comfort there, without stopping to question if they belong there or not. Some do. Some don’t. Sometimes both situations work out, sometimes neither do.

Some identify their sexualities based on their sexual behaviour patterns and not by their feelings at all. They’ve not been exposed to the fact that one’s sexuality is not merely determined by having sex and has to do with a complete emotional, physical and spiritual attachment to one gender* or the other.

*Gender is an entirely different issue altogether which only my friend Skywalker can describe with such apt eloquence that I’ll never be able to find on my own, as he’s done here.

There are many more observations that you have probably made. Mine were in relation to people’s sexualities within the bounds of my observations and I thought I’d share them with you. And within those very limitations, I want to still bring back my initial point; nothing is wrong or right.

To round it all off, I’m reminded of a that I think is most apt. I’ve been listening to it while typing this post out but can’t seem to upload ot or find a proper video since youtube is bloody blocked at work. It’s an original by Seal, covered by Alanis Morisette by the name of “Crazy”. Try and give it a listen if you have the time. I’m sure you’ve all heard it. 😛

We’re never going to survive unless we get a little crazy

In a world full of people only some want to fly. Isn’t that crazy?

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So don’t ask me why and how but it’s in the middle of the day at work and I’m stoned. And I decided to write a post. And all that came to mind was this amazing exchange between a couple in this movie called Imagine Me & You that I watched a while ago and have watched twice after as well. It’s a gay themed movie in which one woman is a florist and the woman she loves has a passion for lilies. In the midst of their conversation, the florist tells her lover that giving someone a lily means “I dare you to love me’. It’s that amazing stuff? So I googled it and discovered that the Tiger Lily, actually does mean that. I’ve been going through this wierd pessimistic phase since of late and the optimist needed to break through again. I dare you to love me. That there is powerful stuff noh?

The Tiger Lily. A crass, loud, vibrant flower, implying the need to bare all of  your ugly self to another soul, daring them to love you, just the way you are.

Tiger Lily by Camera Wielding Fool

Tiger Lily by Camera Wielding Fool

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Three cheers to a fantastic production crew for handing their first production with such finesse and thank you so much to the cast for a performance well pulled off. (I think there was some syntax error in that sentence there, but what the heck!) It was an experience to work with such diverse personalities. And thank you Revati Chawla, for some super photography.

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Shall post more pictures when I have the time with a proper run-down of this highly controversial production. Performed to a closed audience, but none the less, one I would like a wider group to see someday.

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Sathya, the Women’s Support Group’s first theatre production, supported by the Trikone Arts Foundation goes on the boards this Friday. An eye opener about marriage, sexuality & the definition of love.

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On the streets of Mumbai.

That’s where I was for almost a week. On a soul search. On a hunt for knowledge. And in the process I met an amazing group of people who just wanted acceptance and understanding. Something I have been craving for most of my life too. You see I’ve been under the misconception that I am the most misunderstood person on the planet. People just misunderstand the things I say and do. In the case of these people, their very existence is misunderstood.

They are technically three groups of people; transgenders, kothis and hijras. Now I’m not going to get into a technical definition of them. Please refer Wikipedia or some other trusted online source for that.

I’m more concerned about telling you about how wonderful they are. How I fell in love with them in seconds of meeting them on the dirty streets of Mumbai. Of how we shopped together and laughed together like silly girls. Of how we ate in precarious street side eateries together, chatting like old friends. Of how one of them, a hijra guru at that, told me that she instinctively took to me because I was straightforward with her instead of staring at her like she was a freak of nature. And then she proceeded to eat very little, telling me that she needs to watch her figure. I burst out into a peal of laughter. And you know what? She didn’t slap me. She laughed with me at her own silliness. And then she winked at me. A wink that would have put the likes of Brad Pitt to shame.

And about how I got the best deals in town for my new shoe collection, which upon unpacking made me think I could give Imelda Marcos a run for it. I got them for about 20% of the asking price simply because one of my Hijra friends were standing next to me and threatening the shop keeper or street hawker with the dreaded curse of the Hijra which everyone fears like the kiss of death. There’s more of how I walked along the crowded streets with a group of them and watched everyone nod or bow respectfully because they were more powerful than Uncle Mervin’s thugs.

They laughed with me when I leaned in to kiss them goodnight and found rough stubble on some of their cheeks. One hugged me spontaneously when I told her that I felt we were already friends in a matter of hours. She promptly proceeded to take my phone number and promised to bombard me with calls. After all, once you’re friends you do call eachother and keep in touch.

They are a magical group of people. And I’m not just talking about traditional Hijra magic.They radiate a sense of being about them in their every move, from their shiny saris that dance in the lights on the streets and jingly jewellery to their garishly perfect make-up and beautiful smiles that light up their faces, silently telling me that they are genuinely happy to have known me. And I too am happy to have known and moved among them for a few days. It’s opened my eyes to something about myself that I am proud of. They’re nice people and I like them. That’s all that matters. I adore them for their colourful lifestyle and wonder why I have left the brighter parts of myself in some lonely closet corner. The loudest thing I did was to colour my hair red. And even then I caved in and dyed it black again when too many people started to glare at me in shock on the streets.

I am blessed to have met the apparently cursed tribe of Hijras and Kothis along my journey. I hope to return and renew my friendships with them someday. Who knows when that day will come though? I am blessed to have walked and talked with them for a while on my journey through life. On my journey to change the lives of people like them who aren’t afraid but are still cornered and spat on by the pseudo normative asses of this world simply because of two dirty little words called ignorance and intolerance.

Pooja, Manisha and Nitha. You are beautiful, magical people. Thank you for unforgettable memories on the streets of Mumbai. Simply because you are who you are, I feel blessed.

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Why does everything have to come with an ache attached to it? Just something that was on my mind. It just seems like that. Let’s just leave it there and move on to other things for the moment shall we? There are other things going on in my life too.

I’m flying to India tomorrow. Considering I was little travel bug when I was younger, the adult travel has been minimal and for some strange reason I have never been to India before. It won’t be a vacation though. I’m going to be doing interesting things. I’ll be a part of a South-Asian coalition of gay rights activists being put together to workshop and brainstorm the way forward for LGBTIQ persons in this part of the world. So far, besides Nepal no other country signed the UN treaty to eliminate gay bashing. Does the refusal to sign mean that these countries, including Sri Lanka are in effect saying that violence and legal action against a person’s right to love is ok? I’m not expecting miracles, but I am excited about the workshop and what its possible results will be.

On another note, Brandix’s poem “Perspective” has always a piece of brilliant writing that’s been close to my heart from the day it was written. It reminds me that I haven’t lost my way eventhough it seems that way sometimes. I read it to a friend a few days ago who was feeling exactly the same. Just like its apt title, it really does offer perspective. When you feel like your life has amounted to nothing, when you feel your dreams have died, when you heart is broken, when you’re lonely. This poem just does it for me. I hold on to it as a promise of things to come. For surely, they must.  Have a read : 

Friend, we haven’t lost our way. We are those who’ve been left behind to find our own way. And along that way we’ve discovered truth, freedom and greatness.

We’ve learned ways of life that others have only dreamed of and we’ve learned how to continue loving long after they’ve left with our hearts.

Those who laugh at us, laugh not because they’re superior but because in our presence they feel inferior.

We fear no defeat because they’ve beaten us into the ground and all that’s left for us to gain is victory.

We fear no loss because we’ve lost it all and what we have now, no one can take away.

We fear no death because we’ve lived each moment like it was our last, like tomorrow would never come.

We are a strange kind of people in search of something we cannot find, yet we never give up looking because we know it’s there, somewhere.

To understand us they need to become us and that my friend they can never be. For unlike us they weren’t left behind. Unlike us they’ve never had to hope, to wish, to want, to need, to give, to love, to lose.

But let them wait for us, if they can, for we will find our way soon and when we do, they will watch us do great things.

– Brandon Ingram

Thank you again Brandon. I think this answered my quandary at the opening of this post too.

 

I’m off people. Miss me! 

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I was going to post this and never really had the time to what with camping and having to get back to the reality of the grind afterwards. The fact that Lasantha was assassinated may not have anything to do with this editorial he wrote & published on the 28th of December and I was going to post it here not knowing that he was going to die. I was going to say so many things about how we need more men of his integrity and insight, but I think quite a bit has been said already over the past few days and too little done collectively. Just read… the words are self explanatory…

Gays Are People, Too

To its eternal shame, Sri Lanka last week abstained from adopting the UN’s non-binding declaration calling for the decriminalization of homosexuality. The statement, which called on “States to take all the necessary measures… to ensure that sexual orientation or gender identity may under no circumstances be the basis for criminal penalties, in particular executions, arrests or detention”, was supported by 66 nations, including all 27 members of the EU. Sri Lanka, together with 65 other states, abstained. It might have been worse: 59 countries backed a Syrian statement opposing the declaration, which they claimed could lead to “social normalization [sic], and possibly the legitimization, of many deplorable acts including paedophilia”.

Amazingly in this Third Millennium, homosexuality remains a criminal offense in 77 (almost all Islamic or developing) countries, in seven of which it carries the death penalty. Among developed nations, only the United States declined to sign, apparently because of President Bush’s religious convictions. Nevertheless, same-sex marriage is allowed in two US states (Massachusetts and Connecticut) while eight others recognize gay and lesbian civil unions. Next door, Canada has completely legalized same-sex marriage.

While Israel, among the non-secular states, supported the declaration enthusiastically, the Vatican and Syria found themselves cast as strange bedfellows in opposing the proposal, timed to coincide with the 60th Anniversary of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. Their antagonism to the decriminalization of homosexuality is not surprising. After all, both Islam and Roman Catholicism regard objectivity as some kind of poison. And it cannot have helped the Vatican’s angst that all Europe’s Catholic nations, together with almost all of Latin America, signed up.

Next year we celebrate the 400th anniversary of Galileo’s invention of the telescope. Yet, for demonstrating that the earth goes round the sun, Galileo stood accused of heresy by the Vatican. On pain of death the Inquisition in 1633 forced him to “abjure, curse and detest” the very idea that the earth orbits the sun, having done which, however, he muttered famously under his breath, E pur si muove—”But it does move”. It was only in 1992 that Pope John Paul II finally conceded that the earth goes round the sun after all—something the rest of us somehow knew all along—and admitted that the Galileo affair “may have been mishandled” by the Vatican. And the reason the Church had condemned Galileo in the first place was because of a passing statement in the Bible that “The Lord set the earth on its foundations; it can never be moved” (Psalm 104: 5).

Likewise, the same scripture condemns sex between people of the same gender (or at any rate men, for women in scripture, with a handful of celebrated exceptions, seem to have enjoyed about the same status as cattle). “If a man lies with a man as one lies with a woman,” says the good book, “both of them have done what is detestable. They must be put to death; their blood will be on their own heads” (Leviticus, 20:13). All very cut and dry—as far as the heads go, at any rate. As for Islam, while there is no doubt that homosexuality is frowned upon, no punishment is prescribed in the Qu’ran. Many Islamic countries, however, nevertheless punish gays with death. Put tritely, the Judeo-Christian religions seem to say, “Kindly note that God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.”

But if our societies are to operate on the basis of a morality codified in a remote desert several millennia ago, we would have to condone a wealth of horrible practices including genocide, infanticide, slavery, mutilation, human sacrifice and torture. Human societies have come a long way from that. It is humanism—not divine morality—that gives us the values we treasure most today: democracy, egalitarianism, liberty. As much as the adherents of many religions may dislike the fact, the UN Charter on Human Rights transcends the values handed down by most religions, certainly the Judeo-Christian ones. Thus we no longer burn heretics at the stake or chop people’s hands off for thievery.

It is a pity that Sri Lanka and the others that refused to sign the UN declaration cannot bring themselves to recognize that the legalization of homosexuality—treating homosexuals as socially equal to heterosexuals—is a necessary step in the progress of humanity. We have come a long way since the Middle Ages, abolishing slavery, shunning autocracy, giving equal rights to women and members of ‘lower’ castes, and preventing the exploitation of children. None of these ideals are embodied in scripture or religion: they represent the progress of man beyond the bounds of a code that may have worked well for a tribe of herdsmen in Judea 2,500 years ago, but has no relevance now.

Sadly for Sri Lanka, its Penal Code is based not on its own traditions and values, but on the Victorian morality of its one-time colonizers. There is no explicit mention of homosexuality in either Buddhism or the Mahavamsa. Perhaps same-sex love was one that dared not speak its name, but neither the country’s religion nor its culture seek to regulate what consenting adults do in the privacy of their bedrooms. The Penal Code bequeathed us by the British in 1883 (coincidently the same year the word ‘homosexuality’ entered the English lexicon), however, has a different take on things. Its section 365 makes “any act of gross indecency” in public or in private between persons of the same sex an offence. For more than a century the provision applied to male homosexual activity alone, but in 1995 it was amended to include females, and the penalties enhanced. It warrants note that this amendment, which in effect made homosexuality an even greater offence, was brought to cabinet by none other than G. L. Peiris.

It is widely considered that the most outspokenly homophobic men are themselves often repressed homosexuals struggling with their own sexuality. This was, for example, the case with the Rev. Ted Haggard, the US anti-gay crusader and leader of the National Association of Evangelicals, who was last year exposed as having a relationship with a gay masseur who was also supplying him with cocaine. At the time of the exposure, Haggard was married and had five children.

The argument put forward against the UN declaration by the Muslim world holds that homosexuality is not genetic, but a deliberately acquired lifestyle choice. This is sad, for there contemporary science shows unequivocally that sexual orientation is genetically and environmentally determined. We must therefore rise above stereotyping homosexuals as evil monsters who have AIDS or who prey on little boys. As Mark Tewksbury, the gay Canadian Olympic swimming medallist put it, “Why would anybody choose a life that’s going to be filled with difficulty and discrimination?”

Sherman de Rose (who founded the gay-rights NGO Companions on a Journey) regularly points out that 80% of our HIV-positive cases are exclusively heterosexual. And when it comes to paedophilia, while the cases of a few homosexual paedophiles are notorious (especially Roman Catholic clergymen church vis-Ă -vis boys in their care), the incidence of incestual heterosexual paedophilia is known to be far more widespread in Sri Lanka. Sadly, because custodians of the children in question are themselves often the perpetrators, such cases are rarely reported or prosecuted. Besides, in a predominantly Buddhist society such as ours, we rarely even stop to think of the fate of the hundreds of little boys handed over as abittayas to the all-male societies of Buddhist temples each year, for whom there is almost no redress in the eventuality of abuse.

To a large extent, the problem lies with officialdom and not society at large. Sri Lankan society itself is remarkably tolerant—perhaps even more so than some western ones. For example, see two men holding hands as they chat on a street in London and you immediately conclude they are gay. See the same in Sri Lanka and the thought does not cross your mind: young men here hold hands even if they are just friends. Even though Sri Lanka has had its share of gays in public office and even in the cabinet, neither the media nor the people seem to think it matters in the least. Sexual orientation has never been an issue in politics, as indeed it should not.

The media, however, have from time to time behaved less than commendably. While it is commonplace for cheap cracks to be made on the ambiguity of the word ‘gay’, the tone can often turn more menacing. In 1999, for example, The Island newspaper published a homophobic letter protesting a lesbian conference, which called on the police to “to let loose convicted rapists among the jubilant but jaded jezebels when their assembly is in full swing so that those who are misguided may get a taste of the real thing.” Gays and lesbians were outraged by the incitement to violence against them, and Sherman de Rose took the matter to the Press Council. Shockingly, the Council unleashed an even more shamefully homophobic tirade against de Rose. “Lesbianism is at least an act of gross indecency and unnatural”, it held, adding that homosexuality is an immoral and abnormal crime. “Somehow [presumably by means including rape], misguided and erratic women should be corrected and allowed to understand the true sense and reality of life.” Not stopping there, it went on to attack de Rose personally, claiming that if he “encourages and promotes abnormal or immoral acts in society, he cannot argue that the media has no right to criticise such activities.” Finally, the Council held that as the complainant was a male (and therefore not a lesbian), he could not suffer rape in the manner referred to in the letter and as such he had no standing on the issue. Ironically, it is an open secret in media circles that more than one of Sri Lanka’s newspaper moguls is a closet gay, which perhaps explains their homophobia.

Part of the establishment’s antipathy to homosexuality comes from the uncritical adoption of Victorian values. (It was she, after all, who insisted that tables in Buckingham Palace should be covered with tablecloths because men seeing bare wooden legs might entertain lascivious thoughts.) It was also Victorian prudery that caused Colombo’s police to stamp out the charming custom of lovers smooching at sunset under the cover of golf umbrellas on the Galle Face promenade. A more enlightened country might not only have condoned the practice, but gone on to make a tourist attraction of it (“Come, see the Umbrella Lovers of Colombo!”), as Parisians have done with (usually decent) lovemaking on the benches on the banks of the Seine.

Some of the most creative minds in history have been homosexual, and they have enormously enriched the world in which we live. Elton John, Arthur C. Clarke, Oscar Wilde, Tchaikovsky, Handel, T. E. Lawrence (‘of Arabia’), Michelangelo, Leonardo de Vinci and about half of Hollywood (and, from what one hears, Bollywood). Alan Turing, the mathematical genius who famously broke the Enigma Code during World War II and went on to become the father of computer science as we know it, committed suicide after forcibly being administered feminizing hormones to “cure” his homosexuality, as an alternative to prison.

Even Barrack Obama, throughout his campaign for the presidency repeatedly equated sexual orientation to race, almost always following his appeals to “All Americans, black or white” with “gay or straight”. While Bush’s first crisis in office was 9/11, Bill Clinton’s was quite different: the furore he unleashed when he tried to repeal the law that prohibits anyone who “demonstrates a propensity or intent to engage in homosexual acts” from serving in the armed forces of the United States. Obama pledged in his campaign that he would by 2010 bring legislation to do just that.

Sadly among the Asian nations, only two—Nepal and Japan—signed up to the UN declaration. Even South Africa, which just 15 years ago criminalized marriage between blacks and whites, now recognizes same-sex marriage. Thailand, a country with strong Buddhist credentials might have signed if only it had a government at the time. Homosexuality is not an offence in Thailand and in 2002 the Thai government went so far as to formally announce that it did not consider the condition a disease. Likewise, the Vietnamese-Buddhist spiritual leader Thich Nhat Hanh has openly supported civil same-sex unions, while in 2004 Cambodia’s King Norodom Sihanouk publicly called for the legalization of same-sex marriage. And anyone who thinks the ancient Hindus were averse to homoeroticism hasn’t read the Kama Sutra, visited the temples of Khajuraho or Chhapri, or heard of auparashtika.

Much to his credit and to everyone’s surprise, Nepal’s Maoist Prime Minister Prachanda personally led the parliamentary crusade to adopt the UN declaration. Following Nepal’s “Yes” (Yes, we can!) vote, Sunil Pant, an openly gay Member of Parliament pointed out that “society in general is always ready to respect one another, support each other, living in harmony together, regardless of whom we choose to love.” Indeed, as Sherman de Rose put it, “We [gays and lesbians] are against the fact that we are being called criminals in our own land. We are not criminals, we are citizens… We have the right to live and be treated as normal human beings.”

Ours has been a remarkable age, for in the lifetime of many of us prejudices that have dogged mankind for thousands of years have been overcome. Women are now treated as equal to men and have the vote; autistic children are no longer imprisoned in asylums; the physically handicapped are welcomed as full members of society; and racism and religious discrimination have largely been consigned to the closet. In this new Age of Enlightenment, homophibia has become the last acceptable prejudice. Women love gossiping about who might be gay, and a minority of men confused about their own sexuality shower derision on homosexuals.

Just last Tuesday, the BBC reported Pope Benedict XVI as stating that saving humanity from homosexual or transsexual behaviour is just as important as saving rainforests from destruction. Many gays probably think this rich, coming from a man who habitually cross-dresses while he himself has never been in a heterosexual relationship.

Well, Mr de Rose and others engaged in same-sex relationships, or of bisexual or transgender orientation, be assured that we at The Sunday Leader hear you. It is no secret that our commitment to liberal secularism often leads us where others fear to tread, whether in combating racism or prejudice of any other kind. The sixty-something nations that have legalized homosexuality are not in consequence hotbeds of perverted depravity. They are all progressive liberal democracies, indeed, much more so than we are. The time has come for Sri Lanka too, to move on, and to shake off the shackles of an antiquated morality the British themselves abandoned 40 years ago. It is time we joined the community of nations that subscribes to the view that gays are people, too.

http://www.thesundayleader.lk/20081228/editorial-.htm

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