Archive for the ‘Yala’ Category

When December rolled around, I made a promise to her and myself that I will turn things around for myself. That a new dawn will come and I will start anew. Be born again and rise from the ashes as I usually do when terrible things come my way. Of course unlike all the crappy things that have happened in my life, this last situation has to have been the worst. If I go into the gory details right now, you won’t believe me anyway.

 I didn’t make a big list in my head or anything but somehow I knew that at midnight on the last day of this year, it would hit me. Almost like a list would appear from no where and it would be exactly what I needed to get through this year. 

Things happened. Christmas came and went, so did my birthday. Before I knew it I was on a midnight ride to Tissamaharama. I woke up the next morning, had a drink and toasted to the last day of the year with a tiny tinge of anticipation about what midnight would hold for me. 

We went on a boat ride. The wind was flying through my hair. I had my best bud with me and things seemed so nice. Off we went on what I would like to call a soul safari. Sadly I didn’t spot any leopard. But going back to Yala was like going back home. You see my Dad had this little holiday home by the lake in Weerawila and I would spend many of my vacations there. Inevitably it would lead to a weekly ride through the jungle on one of Daddy’s jeeps.

Going back into the area reminded me of exactly how much of my father’s daughter I am. My mum hated the outdoors and hunting and big game fishing and camping and everything my father was about. She tried her hardest to keep me away from it as well. But the older I grew, my passion for the outdoors became like an infectious disease. I craved for it more and more. Thank heavens for those few vacations I had in Trinco over the last few years or I would have died. There’s something about places in this country with minimal inhabitants that touch a chord in me. But Yala and Tissa and Weerawila are all about my childhood. About a time when things were simpler. A time I can appreciate far more now than I could then. I remember vacationing there with Mirantha. Of how we made our little base of operations in the back garden by the lake. Of how we screamed obscenities at the passers by as we drove to Katharagama. Yessiree… I am Daddy’s Girl.

Flash forward : The camp site was set up, the BBQ was on its way. Everyone was drinking up and smoking up and having a good time. Just when it got close to midnight I walked off and sat alone. Waiting. For that big moment to hit me. Midnight came and went. And I was still waiting. I could hear them calling out my name and looking for me. But I still waited. The moment just had to hit me. Some huge miraculous thing. And it didn’t. I sat there alone in the darkness and finally Marzipan found me, flung her arms around me and wished me a happy new year. 

Everything else was a bit of a haze until the following morning. I opened my tent flap and witnessed the most beautiful sunrise. The world looked as though it had been washed in a golden glow. And then it hit me. The fact that nothing was supposed to hit me at all. I mean what was I expecting? A shooting star to fall on my head the previous night?

I came back to Colombo missing the jungle and the little vision quest that I thought I was on. It feels a little incomplete that a menhir didn’t crack my skull open. But in the process, I think I realized that the best thing I can do for myself is not to wait for those special moments and plan for them and expect something epic to happen.

I’m going to let 2009 happen to me because I know I can handle  just about anything, come what may. What’s important is that I am stronger than anyone has ever given me credit for. Than even I have.

What’s important is that I’ll be ok. 



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The Smashing Pumpkins said “believe in the resolute urgency of now” and as if to contradict themselves, they also said “the more you change the less you feel” 

I think both those statements just about sums up the last 2 weeks of my life. The last 2 weeks in which I have not been in contact with the rat race, internet and at times not even been where I could get phone signals to boot. All I can say is that I want to run back and re-live them. There are no words to explain the feelings, so I’ll give you the low-down and let you feel for yourself. 

I landed at Marzipan’s on Christmas day and never left. I went home once to get clothes but that was about it. For those of you who don’t know Marzipan, she’s my bestest friend in the whole world. Since my birthday was the next day, she organized a surprise birthday BBQ and invited the rest of our friends with whom we all grew up together. It was amazing to say the least. They served as a reminder that not all of my 29 years were a waste. 

The next few days were a haze of alcohol, cigarettes and way too much weed. It was fabulous. It reminded me of how much of a bum I am inside. I work hard, play hard and do all those rat-racy things that are expected of me just to survive. But if I had a choice, I sit around doing nothing, smoking up and being happy. Doing nothing makes me happy? Did I say that? That’s the effect of so much grass in my system I guess.

Then someone came up with a harebrained scheme to camp out in Yala on 31st night. So we all packed off and set out, doing just that. It was like coming home for me after spending so many months of my childhood there. And we found a perfect spot on the beach, set up camp and had the most unusual 31st night ever. Shooting stars, the wilderness and perfect company. Who could ask for more?

Add to that boat rides & a river bath in Tissa, a peaceful night in Unawatuna with some outta this world grass and I don’t think I wanted anything to do with Colombo anymore.

The best part of it all? That I am blessed to have the bestest friend in the whole wide world. Someone who would do so much just to see a smile on my face. I can’t believe your gone Mars. Its like the light went out of the world all over again.

I’m so proud of the woman she has become. She is mellower and despite how much she complains of the weight she’s put on, I really looked at her and what I saw was a mother. A beautiful, loving mother with the perfect baby boy. She is blessed and I am blessed to have a wild-child turned mother-goddess as my best friend.

And my New Year resolution? Not to make one.

I think this is going to be the year where I take life as it comes.  

Happy New Year blogsphere… 

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