I sit here watching the sun go down, miles away from home
And I wonder the strangest thoughts.
Of what you would taste like if you were here
Of how you smile at me when I try my hardest to make you mad
Of how you sulk when I try to make you smile, but still hold onto my hand
Of how you fall asleep in my arms & won’t wake up no matter how much I love you
Of how hard you’ve fucked me, of how gently you’ve loved me
Strange dirty little thoughts of you, even when I want to enjoy this lonely sunset
Will you never leave me alone? Will you not let me enjoy myself?
Will you hear these words and mistake them for me wanting you to finally leave me?
Because its the absolute opposite
Its just that its in times like these that I love you the most
When I long for you with every exhalation
Needing to inhale you back into my system and keep you there
Hold my breath and hold you in
Because I am so afraid that you will awaken from the spell I’ve put you under
And walk into the sunrise again
That’s why I need to be alone
To get used to life without you
And sometimes even yearn for you more than when you are with me
Terrible, terrible you
You’ve healed me & tortured me at the same time
I didn’t try so hard to send the demons away
Just for you to walk in and haunt me with yours
You with your perfect smile
That makes me gnaw & grind my teeth when I can’t kiss it
Even when you’re so damn close
I’m screaming inside, my mind is hoarse
But its ok because the sun is almost down now
And I know I will awaken to you
awww
“I didn’t try so hard to send the demons away
Just for you to walk in and haunt me with yours” O.o
hehe
nice one (:
Wow. That hit me like a sledgehammer. Full force. No mercy. You’ve written my thoughts.
Guess its a time for happy-sad melancholy feelings all-round these days huh? Glad you like it.
That’s a good one. Maybe it’s something in the air. But I ID with it. I want somebody back who doesn’t want me back. Someone who I’ve hurt too much. But whom I still love too much to let go.
wow… wow… wow… can’t get past that… wow…! I can soooo relate…
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